Happily ever after doesn’t do justice to anyone’s experience of marriage. A former professor of mine dedicated a book to his wife of 69 years, writing “For Darlene, in pleasure and pain.” The book itself concerns holding the tension between opposites, both within ourselves and in relationships. Some degree of ambivalence towards one’s partner […]
The No Surprises Act of 2022: What it means for psychologists
The No Surprises Act of 2022 (H.R. 133) and the Good Faith Estimate (GFE) are important changes in how patients are informed about the costs of health care treatment. Consumers have a right to an estimate of costs involved in medical treatment and to be able to advocate for themselves if they dispute charges. As […]
Relationship Mindset: How implicit beliefs affect romantic relationships
Like the proverbial moth to a flame, we are drawn to the intense experience of romantic passion. In popular culture, this passion indicates that partners are soulmates who are meant to be together forever. Romance novels and movies end at happily ever after, but in real life, many couples struggle to maintain romance and sexual […]
Bittersweet and Everything In Between
Being able to hold opposing emotions is one of the hallmarks of good mental health. Something can be both bitter and sweet, and we tend to feel that we must pick sides. To our confusion, we often can’t stick with one or the other feelings — either getting pulled back and forth, or stuck in […]
Passion, Sex, and Romance in Long-term Relationships
It is not uncommon to have romantic fantasies about people other than your partner. It’s not just normal; it can even enhance your marriage—that is, unless those fantasies cross the line, which is what I’ll talk about in this post. In a long-term marriage, romance can depart, and sex can follow. From the outside, couples […]
